IZJackass antics!
by longgoooone
Summary: Behold! My first entry! Basically Zim & Gir playing pranks on the rest of the cast and other characters of Nick shows! OH MY GOD! PRT 8!!!!!! THE LAST CHAPTER!!! READ! REVIEW!
1. The following is performed by proffessio...

IZ/Jackass ZIM & G.I.R.s backstage antics!  
  
Guh.. I really hate typing but I really need to brush up on my writing.. Stuff, I'm quite wired cuz I jus came back from seeing Austin Powers 3 & Triple X (Vin Deisel, ... Oo0o the sexi-ness!) Austin 3 actually kinda sucked.. I was quite mad. No not really, but disappointed.. What was I doing? Oh yes, IZ/Jackass antics! Hahaha I should start shouldn't I? K, here goes. (eh, I don't own IZ or Jackass though I am deeply in love with both shows ^_^ )  
  
Scene begins with Jackass warning cept at the bottom instead of a human skull with cross bones it is slightly altered with Irken antennae **Fade to wobbly camera work that looks like the holder is walking down a hall of some sort with words "The room switch" in white letters in the middle of the screen** (Zim walks in front of camera wearing a blue t-shirt with a bird that looks something like woody woodpecker on crack with a cigar in it's mouth "Knoxville Tennessee" is printed underneath, he's also wearing a sort of plastic red visor, black chucks, & black sunglasses, yes. It's the Johnny attire XD)  
  
Zim: When I'm not on the set of my show reeking havoc on the pathetic worm babies of this spinning ball of dust, I like to reek havoc on my co- workers right here in Nickelodeon studios **camera goes to Nickelodeon sign nearby**  
  
*back to Zim**  
  
Zim: But not without the help of my evil minion, Gir  
  
**camera spins around to show Gir holding the camera towards himself wearing the bunny the life guard attire (white bunny ears, Hawaiian lei & leopard undies & yes, I know Chris Pointious aka bunny the lifeguard doesn't work camera but aint it funnier to see Gir as Bunny? lol)**  
  
Gir: Hii!! I do the camera!! Weeeeeee!!! **shakes and spins camera showing everything whirling past in a blur =X**  
  
Zim: Gir! This is not the Blair Witch project! Stop that nauseating camera shaking!  
  
Gir: O.K.!  
  
Zim: ANY-ways. we are about to begin our first skit.  
  
**camera shows two doors with big gold stars with the names "Gaz" and "Dib" printed on them** **cut back to Zim**  
  
Zim: Hi I'm Invader Zim and this is the room switch (Zim peels off both stars stickers and switches places hence "the switching")  
  
Zim: [wispering to camera] Now, Gaz, as well as I and Gir had the day off because today was the shooting of "The sad tale of chicken-foot" Dib was the only character involved and gets off-set in about ten minutes.. You can guess whats going to happen next muhaha *cough** eh heh..  
  
  
  
Yo, guess what? I'm tired & my leg hurts.. Bad. So for the sake of going to bed, adding retarded suspense to my pathetic excuse of a parody I'm going to bed. please read & review I need the motivation, if you do I swear I'll make it better! And please, PLEASE don't be too, too mean, this is my first submission after all =\ 


	2. or total idiots

IZ/Jackass Antics.. Continued!  
  
Ahhhhh. Pizza, the breakfast of champions. Hello my fellow IZ & Jackass lovers! Thank you to the ppl who posted their positive reviews to me! They are much appreciated ^_^ Any who, on to the antics! We left off with Zim switching the star decals to Gaz & Dibs dressing room...  
  
**Cut to camera showing the corridor of the dressing rooms sort of low to the ground and viewing from behind a fairly large trash can. Zim is crouched behind the trashcan peering through the separation of it and the wall**  
  
**From opposite end of the corridor Dib is seen tiredly walking around the corner of a door opening towards the dressing rooms**  
  
Dib: huh, I could have sworn my room seemed farther away before.. *shrugs**  
  
**Zim & Gir snicker quietly, camera zooms in on Dib as he opens the door and starts to walk in the door**  
  
**Gaz's voice is heard faintly yelling from the room**  
  
Gaz: DIB! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?? GET OUT!!!  
  
**Objects are heard smashing and are seen being thrown out of the room hitting the wall opposite side**  
  
Dib: But Gaz! Ow! This is my room! OW!! Stop it!!  
  
Gaz: DON'T EVER COME IN MY DRESSING ROOM EVER!!  
  
**Objects continue to be smashed and thrown out of room, at this point Zim and Gir are in hysterics**  
  
Gaz: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER!!!  
  
**Dib is thrown out of the room like a ragdoll and hits wall in front of the door landing in the pile of books, broken vases and lamps**  
  
Dib:*struggling to get back on his feet* Owwww.  
  
**Dib looks up and notices the star peel and fall off the door**  
  
Dib: What the?  
  
Zim: **Jumps out from behind trashcan with Gir** MUAHAHAHAHA!! Gotcha DIB!  
  
Dib: ZIM! YOU ARE SUCH A JERK!  
  
**Dib starts chasing Zim and Gir down corridor**  
  
**Camera cuts to Zim's face close up to camera with tears down his face all Blair Witchy-like**  
  
Zim: I'm soo sorry.. **Makes squeaky squealy noise** I... I've just never laughed so hard in my life! **makes same noise but sounds more like a laugh** and I just.. can't stop!!  
  
**camera zooms back from Zim's face to show they're sitting in a janitor's closet**  
  
Gir: Shhhhh! The kitties will heaarrrr youuuu! **gives creepy stare**  
  
Zim: **still has tears down his face with a HUGE open mouthed grin on his face** (laughing) Your insane Gir.  
  
**Door of the closet opens showing Dib and Gaz standing there staring evilly holding a bats and rolls of toilet paper, the beat of Eminem "Just don't give a ." begins**  
  
Gir: Hii!!  
  
**Zim continues to laugh hysterically**  
  
**Camera cut to Zim and Gir hanging from the flag pole in front of Nickelodeon Studios beaten to a pulp and wrapped in toilet paper cocoons**  
  
Gir: I LIKE DOOKIE!  
  
Zim: (hazily) Join us next time.. yeah.  
  
END! Whatcha think? Huh? Huh? Huh? Yah I know it sucked. I need to come up with the idea of the nex chapter but I do know it will have something to do with other Nick shows. Remember people this is all in fun! Please take no offense to whatever show I choose to be the butt of the next joke, and okaay.. I wont pick on the butt uglies as much as I despise that show. I do admit that would be overkill of old jokes and plus I like to be a little different! I also apologize for the Bair Witch joke, it seemed right at the time.. 


	3. or by proffesional idiots

IZ/Jackass Antics... Pt. 3!!!  
  
Well hello0o!! **sits at desk with hands overlapped each other .. her right hand is completely frozen in a thick layer of ice and has turned blue** **looks at hand then slowly hides underneath desk** I had a minor disagreement with the freezer......  
  
On to pt. 3!!  
  
**screen shows Jackass warning with alter irken antennae .. yada ..yada . you've already read that in the beginning, lets move on.**  
  
Scene: Zim & Gir are sitting on a grass hill in front of Nick studios Gir is holding the camera pointed at Zim the words "The divorce" lingering in the middle of the screen  
  
Zim: Welcome back viewers! Yes, Gir and I have fully recovered from our last skit and are on to our next.  
  
**Gir randomly flips camera around and stares directly into the lens 0.o**  
  
Zim: ...Gir.  
  
Gir: **continues to stare**  
  
Zim: Gir!  
  
Gir: **starey stare.**  
  
Zim: GIR!  
  
Gir: **stares** ..yes?  
  
Zim: Gir.. Please. stop... YOUR SCARING THE VIEWERS.  
  
Gir: biscuit?  
  
Zim: yes Gir, . biscuit. **takes camera and holds a fair distance from his face** Our next skit/mission is on to the dressing room of Cozmo and Wanda from The Fairly Odd Parents..  
  
Gir: **takes camera to face** We're gunna dress em' up like monkeys!  
  
Zim: **back in view** not exactly.  
  
**camera cuts to Zim standing in front of a dressing room with two big stars sort of overlapping each other, a shiny green star that says "Cozmo" on the top and underneath it is a shiny pink star that says "Wanda"**  
  
Zim:[gives quirky smirk] **and opens the door and walks in with Gir following behind with camera**  
  
[The dressing room is like any other dressing room except the colors only consist of pink and green]  
  
**Zim walks over to a double door closet with one door green and one door pink**  
  
Zim: [opens green door revealing a little more than a dozen white and black pants hung on green hangers] Hi, I'm Invader Zim and this is the divorce! **takes camera to point at Gir who is fiddling through a fanny pack he has strapped around his waist**  
  
Gir: Aha! [pulls out a red lipstick tube with the words "Stripper Brand" printed in tiny italic letters on its side] Ehehehe! [takes out compact and scarily is able to spread the red lipstick perfectly across his mouth making big womanly lips]  
  
Zim: **grinning** [supporting the camera on his shoulder, takes the first white shirt out of the closet and holds it upright in front of Gir]  
  
Gir: [begins smooching collar of the white shirt] Mwa! Mwa! Mwa- Ahehehehehe!  
  
Zim:**laughing** Okay, that's enough Gir.. [Gir continues to nuzzle and smooch the shirt] **pulls shirt away from Gir** Geez! Enough! [puts shirt back on closet rack and sticks tongue out pondering..] hmm..  
  
Gir: [continues to put more makeup on .. fake eyelashes .. mascara .. blush.. thick blue eye shadow..] I so perty.  
  
Zim: You're so scary.. [eyes come across a green dresser next to an identical pink one] Hah! Gir c'mere!  
  
Gir: **prances over to dresser** yeeeees?  
  
Zim: [takes out a pair of green boxers with little wands printed on them and sticks it on Girs face] hold still. [snickers]  
  
**Zim peels boxers off Gir's face like a sticker**  
  
Gir: [sniffs in] Mmmmmm Fish!  
  
**Suddenly, two persons are heard chatting outside the door**  
  
Zim: Gir! Hide!  
  
**Zim and Gir scramble to find a hiding place until they come across.**  
  
ShiMMy: HAHAHAHA. I'm going to leave it at that for now because I love adding suspense.. stuff..  
  
Random voice: No! You're just retarded and can't come up with the next scene!  
  
ShiMMy: ... SHUTUP! .Fucker.  
  
Random voice: What?  
  
ShiMMy: .nothing.... look! Air!  
  
Random Voice: WHERE? 


	4. Do not try this at home

IZ/Jackass Antics.... pt.4!  
  
ShiMMy: [has blow-dryer and is attempting to thaw out frozen right hand] **mumbles** fucking fish sticks all you do is give me trouble. **looks up**[hides hand once again under desk] ... hey.. don't look at me like that. I have the power of whether or not you get to see part 4 or not..  
  
Random voice: You're an idiot!  
  
ShiMMy: WHO IS THAT?!  
  
Random voice: YER MOM  
  
ShiMMy: Really?  
  
Random voice: Yuh  
  
ShiMMy: Than I have something to say..  
  
Random voice: ....  
  
ShiMMy: IM SORRY MOMMA! I NEVER MEANT TO HURT YooOUuu!!  
  
Random voice: .....  
  
ShiMMy: I NEVER MEANT TO MAKE YOU CRY BUT TONIGHT IM CLEANIN OUT MY CLOSET!!!!!! One more time..  
  
Random voice: NO! NO! STOP! PLEASE GOD!!!  
  
ShiMMy: I SAID IM SORRY MOMMA!!!!!  
  
Random voice: You have the vocal range of a cabbage... please stop...  
  
ShiMMy: FINE! **Slams frozen hand on desk and ice shatters** umm.. lets move on shall we?  
  
Random voice: please..  
  
Scene: Cozmo & Wanda's dressing room. The door begins to open & Zim & Gir are scattering to find a hiding spot.  
  
Zim: [spots a pink cabinet next to would yah guess? An identical green cabinet over a pink and green couch] Gir! Quick! Climb into one of these! [starts to climb into the closer pink cabinet]  
  
Gir:(firmly) BUSCUIT!  
  
Zim: [grabs Gir by his bunny ears and stuffs him inside next to him and shuts door] shhhh...  
  
** The conversation heard faintly before is now sounding very close by**  
  
Cozmo: ..and you KNOW how I am with rashes. [cringes]  
  
Wanda: Yes dear I know, next time we'll just have salad  
  
Zim: **is now driving a small peep hole through cabinet door with a sort of wine bottle opener** [hole is successfully opened and a small amount of light shines through] hehehe.. this should be good, right Gir?  
  
Gir: **mouth is duct-taped** mff mff!!  
  
Zim: Oh yeah. [puts camera to hole]  
  
Camera View: Cozmo & Wanda floating and having a conversation right in front of the cabinet Zim and Gir are sitting in..  
  
Cozmo: What time is it?  
  
Wanda: [looks at clock] About quarter past  
  
Cozmo: Really? A quarter? I'm gunna name it Steve!  
  
Gir: **giggles through duct-tape**  
  
Zim: **give look of disgust over bad joke**  
  
Wanda: That's not what I meant.. but we have about 15 minutes til we go back on set..  
  
Cozmo: Than we better conveniently change into some other clothes [walks- er, floats over to closet]  
  
Wanda: ..Why?  
  
Cozmo: [takes out first white shirt on closet rack]  
  
Wanda: [notices red lip stick smeared all over the collar of Cozmo's shirt] **eyes widen** What is that?  
  
Cozmo: What is what?  
  
Wanda: **points at lipstick smears** THAT.  
  
Cozmo: [looks at smears] Oh that... dunno.  
  
Wanda: You know DAMN WELL WHAT IT IS  
  
Cozmo: No really. I--[catches on] ohhhhh.. Baby listen!  
  
Wanda: NO! I'M NOT DEALING WITH THIS AGAIN!  
  
Cozmo: **eyes widen**  
  
Wanda: [paces] I'm going to ask you calmly. have you been fooling around with that Cartoon Network girl again... DeeDee was it?  
  
Cozmo: No! Never again! I was confused at that time sweetie you know I'd never do that again!  
  
Wanda: [paces more rapidly] How long?  
  
Cozmo: Baby, I'm telling you nothings been going on!  
  
Wanda: [screeches] DON'T BABY ME!  
  
Zim: **covers mouth with snickers**  
  
Wanda: [tiredly] We had just gotten back on track. We've gotten our own show making descent money with a good life and you pull this again?!  
  
Cozmo: You've gotta believe me! I'd never!-  
  
Wanda: No! NO MORE LIES! I'M SICK OF IT, GOD KNOW HOW LONG ITS BEEN GOING ON! **floats over to Cozmo's dresser and opens drawer] I WORK SOLO NOW! **starts throwing socks and boxers at Cozmo until she comes across a significant pair...** [gasps] WHAT IS THIS???  
  
Cozmo: [looks at boxers which now have an imprint of women's makeup right in the middle .. basically it looks like Mimi from The Drew Carey show stuck her face on the crotch of his boxers] WHAT THE? NO! SOMEONE MUST HAVE SET ME UP! I HAVE NO IDEA HOW THAT GOT THERE-  
  
Wanda: [wailing] your SICK! [starts smacking Cozmo with boxers] SICK, SICK, SICK!  
  
Zim: [stuck in mass hysteria of muffled giggles]  
  
Gir: [seems to be wriggling to get comfortable and finds he is sitting on an odd object] **peels off duct-tape and takes out something from behind him** heh?  
  
**Wanda continues to pummel Cozmo with the makeup-covered boxers while bawling her brains out**  
  
Zim: **Gir taps shoulder** [snickering] what is it Gir?  
  
Gir: **holds out a pink rubber sausage thing in front of Zim's face** what's this?  
  
Zim: [stops giggling and looks wide eyed at the rubber thing in front of his face] DAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!  
  
**Wanda and Cozmo stop quarreling for a second and look at the screaming pink cabinet**  
  
Zim: **Falls out of cabinet with camera wriggling and squirming to his feet. Gir fallows** eh..  
  
Cozmo: Zim?  
  
Wanda: I thought you were cancelled?  
  
Stage Manager: **pokes head through door** Hey Wanda, Cozmo, your on in 2 minutes get the lead out!  
  
**Cozmo and Wanda stare dumbfounded for a second or two at the stage manager then at Zim**  
  
Zim: [slowly picks up camera] Well. Gir.. I do believe our cabinet studying has been.. long ..enough.. We'd better be on our way **starts strutting speedily out door past manager**  
  
Gir: **Just as they're a little more than half way out the door.** But I thought we were playing a prank on the fairies?  
  
Zim: GIR!  
  
ShiMMy: Woooooooooo! That took a lot outta me! Didga like? Didga, didga, didga? Mucho Thanks to everyone who made me feel special by reviewing! ^_^ I'd also like to add a moment of silence for a reviewer by the name of Sinne, I read your review about your doggy dying recently and it made me feel better to now I made you laugh with this. I know what its like losing pets. I have at least 14 parakeets buried in my backyard.. Definitely not he same but I was still sad, hope you feel better soon! U.U~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~~*~*~*~*~ 


	5. or anywhere else

IZ/Jackass Antics! .. pt. 5!  
  
**Runs in at full speed to computer room for "dramatic entrance"** BAAAAAAAAAAH!!! I'M NOT SICK BUT I'M NOT WEELLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!! AND I'M SO HOTT CUZ I'M IN HELLLLLLLL!!!!!!! **Trips and falls flat on face, THUMP!** UT! .. I'M OKAY! **Staggers to feet** [Puts hands on hips, right hand is completely black from frostbite] what's up? NOT ME, AHAHAH-okay that's enough.... **looks around suspiciously.** umm, this chapter takes place outside of Nick studios. for a few skits, so enjoy!......Random voice? Hello0o? ...... huh... Umm... Moving on?  
  
"Acid Rain"  
  
Scene: Zim and Gir are standing outside of a dance club called "Club Rock- wilder" Zim is wearing his same Johnny attire accept its all torn and burnt looking, he is also wearing his wig and contacts this time. Gir remains in his same Bunny attire =^_^=  
  
**Gir is holding the camera showing Zim looking at him**  
  
Zim: Okay Gir... **exhales hard for a second** ..ZIM can handle this..  
  
Gir: hehehehe [Holds up water bucket in front of Zim] jus say when..  
  
Zim:..... [Squeezes eyes shut] just get it over with ..  
  
Gir: [Without hesitating] O.K! **Throws water on Zim**  
  
Zim: **sizzles and smokes and flails arms over his head] DAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! [Runs into dance club with a trail of smoke is coming off of him- black lights, strobe lights, and all sorts of other colorful lights are everywhere and crazy techno music is playing] HUMANS!!! DON'T GO OUTSIDE!! ITS RAINING ACID OUT THERE!!!!  
  
**Two random druggies look at each other with widened bloodshot eyes then back at Zim**  
  
Random druggies: SIICK! [Run past Zim out of club]  
  
**The rest of the dancers start freaking out and ranting about the end of the world, a couple girls start crying and screaming about how they don't want to die virgins.. =S**  
  
Next scene: Zim and Gir are at KayBee toys just kinda walking around. Little kids are either whining to their parents to but them new toys or pawing through anything they can reach on the shelfs.. or both . children. guh. _0  
  
Gir: [props camera up on shelf facing himself and Zim. Then takes a rubber pig off of shelf and stuffs it in his mouth]  
  
Zim: [spots a shelf of those bouncy ball things that have handles on them that people can sit and bounce on. I forget the name.. X_x.] **hands a bouncy ball thing to Gir then takes one for himself and grips the handle and mounts it** Ready Gir???  
  
Gir: [sticks out tongue and mounts his own bouncy thing] Mmm.. Yes!  
  
Zim: O.K!  
  
**Both start bouncing down aisles .. at first it seems like they're both just innocently playing with the toys but then start plowing through little children that are in their way. I lied, they're plowing through anyone they see (lol)**  
  
**System of a Down-"Bounce!" starts playing.. "Jump! Bounce! Up! Down!"**  
  
Zim: OUT OF ZIM'S WAY!!! [Looks at kid that is no where near him] YOUR'E IN ZIM'S WAY!!! HEY!! HEY!!! **Menacingly bounces toward kid**  
  
Random Kid: [Gets smushed] HEY! I WAS NOWHERE NEAR YOU!! **Zim ignores kid and bounces away**  
  
Gir: **Bounces past kid and spits his rubber pig he had stuffed in his mouth at the kid's head** Ahehehehehe!!!!! **Bounces away**  
  
Zim: [closes eyes and laughs insanely] Ahahahahaha! **Keeps bouncing and laughing until he crashes into someone that makes him bounce back and fall off his bouncy thing** What gives?? [Looks over to see a guy lying in front of him with a pogo stick lying next to him]  
  
Guy??: Hey watch where your goin ya jackass!  
  
Zim: [looks hard at guy for a second] Eddy?! [Puts sunglasses on top of his head and stands up]  
  
Eddy: Hey!. Zim? Oh hey! What's up????  
  
Zim: [Helps Eddy up to show they're the same height, they do a sort of double high five snap hand shake] Not much. those Nick bastards cancelled me.. **Chuckles**  
  
Eddy: What? That sucks! I'll always knew a station which's highlight show is about stinky babies had no taste [sticks out tongue]  
  
**Suddenly a second guy bounces up on another pogo stick**  
  
Ed: I am a horse!  
  
Eddy: Heyy, mono-brow! You remember Zim right? His cruiser crashed into the cul de sac last summer, .. he blew up your little sister!  
  
Ed: [Gets off pogo stick and drops it to side, leans over and stares HARD at Zim for a moment] .No! **Laughs goofily**  
  
Gir: **Bounces back up next to Zim** Master! I've been looking all over for you!  
  
Zim: We've been in the same aisle for the past ten minutes Gir.  
  
Ed: [Sees Gir's bunny ears and his pupils slant to opposite ends of his head] Bunny! **Picks up Gir and begins stroking and petting him** Pet the bunny! Pet the bunny!  
  
Gir: [Giggles insanely] I smell dookie!  
  
Zim & Eddy: **Stare with cocked eyebrows at their erratic companions**  
  
Zim: ANY-ways.. Gir and I were just making some prank videos, its quite amusing wanna join?  
  
Eddy: I guess . [eyes light up] is there any money involved?  
  
Zim: That could be arranged.  
  
Eddy: Sa-weet!  
  
Double-D: **gradually bounces up to group** Honestly Eddy I don't see how you find pleasure in these shenanigans **gets off stick .that's sounds bad =S n e ways..** Oh, hello Zim! Wouldn't expect seeing you here  
  
Zim: As to you, Ed with two D's  
  
Eddy: He was just telling us about a scam he wants us in on..  
  
Zim: Well I didn't exactly say it was a sca-  
  
Ed: Jawbreakers!  
  
Double-D: Well that sounds splendid! We could use some extra assistance in our 'Jawbreaker disbursements'  
  
Zim: All right. If that's what you want to call it okay.  
  
Next scene: Zim, Gir, Ed, Edd n' Eddy are back at Nick Studios. The Ed's are now in different attire, Eddy is wearing a black trench coat with baggy black pants and a white t-shirt (Bam Margera!) Double-D is wearing a black t-shirt with "Big Brother" in white letters on the chest, baggy blue jeans, a light blue plaid bucket hat and black rimmed eye glasses (the guy who always works the camera.. I'm terribly sorry I don't know his name.. I had to watch an eppie I had taped earlier to figure out what his attire was..) and finally, Ed is now wearing from the Wee man skit, the Oompa Loompa costume and green wig. the outfit is practically Wee man's size so it is incredibly tight on the big guy (lol)  
  
OH SHIT SON! Now they've got the Eds on their side! What madness will commence now?!? Yes, yes I know that was probably really boring readers, I'm sorry it is after all a second intro thingy. I also have to ask for forgiveness to anyone who is not an Ed. Edd n' Eddy fan and was like Oh Noooo!! When they realized I had snuck them in. I happen to love them ^_^ so nyah! Stay tuned for Part. 6! With guest stars, the Eds! .. I have to say. I'm feeling terribly neglected, Random voice has ditcheded me! :-O And I never got the chance to confess my love to him!! :..(  
  
Random Voice: .what? 


	6. especially grandma's house

IZ/Jackass Antics!....pt.6!!  
  
ShiMMy: YO, YO, YO Whaddup kidds?? I can't believe this ended up with so many chapters, but I'm doing it all for my faithful reviewers!! 12 reviews may be a little to some, but for me.. It's a great, great thing **cherishes each and every one**  
  
Random Voice: You are so thick.  
  
ShiMMy: ..And that's a BAD thing?  
  
Random Voice: Yes, yes it is, and it makes you a bad, BAD person!  
  
ShiMMy: WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN? . Do you have some demons you need to work out? Because I'm studying psychology this year and..  
  
Random Voice: NO! I just have difficulty being nice to MORONS!  
  
ShiMMy: Come on now.. Let it out..  
  
Random Voice: What are you talking about?  
  
ShiMMy:.....  
  
Random voice: ....  
  
ShiMMy: ....  
  
Random Voice: ALL RIGHT! DADDY DIDN'T LOVE ME!!!! ARE YOU HAPPY???!!!  
  
ShiMMy: Someone's got some Daddy Issues! . Why does this sound strangely familiar? Oh well, now that that's cleared up, lets move on with the antics!  
  
Random Voice: **Cries and whimpers** Daddy wasn't there! It seems he doesn't care!  
  
ShiMMy: **Finds where Random voice is coming from (under her desk) and takes him out and leans his head on her shoulder** It's okay.. It's okay. I'm here for you..  
  
Scene: [In slow motion] All the characters are now in Jackass attire but also with dark sunglasses, ya know, for effect. Zim, Gir, Ed, & Eddy are walking up to the Nick studios doors with the aid of Double-D now working the camera (He's just a lot more steady with the camera than Gir, we all know he means well but when it comes to relying on anyone, Gir jus ain't your robot. But if you want an adorable little companion who loves tacos.holla! He also didn't understand the concept of the 'zoom lens' and ended up giving Zim a black eye) As the 5 are walking in slow-mo looking all cool with Eminem's- Business playing in the background, all of a sudden people start walking behind or past the crew normally and the music stops, but they're still in slow-mo making them look really stupid and just.. Slow. People just kinda stare. Ed scratches his butt in slow motion.  
  
**The crew walk through the main lobby past a large business-like desk with a secretary talking on the phone to someone and as they walk by, she continues to talk but keeps her eyes on them as if they're escaped convicts they continue to walk until they come across the same corridor in the beginning but stop at the dressing room with the big shiny gold star that says "ZIM" on it**  
  
**Skip to scene where all the characters are sitting in what is obviously Zim's dressing room, I'd guess that Zim could care less about what he'd want his room to look like so use your imagination on it's appearance: p**  
  
Zim: Al right now this is going to be our last stunt. so its gotta be big, no.. REALLY BIG and AMAZING. well not as amazing as me. heh, heh.  
  
Eddy: And it's got to get us some money out of it [Wrings hands together greedily]  
  
Double-D: And it's got to be fool-proof and absolutely luminous to anyone we partake it on.  
  
Ed: And it's gotta have CHICKENS!  
  
Double-D: Ed. chickens would aid us in no manner.  
  
Ed: But I LOVE CHICKENS Double-D!  
  
Gir: [Realizes he can suggest something] And it's GOT to have ..[Forgets where he is] Ahahahaha!  
  
Eddy: **Stares off into his fantasy of having endless amounts of money and enough jawbreakers to rot out the teeth of an entire country .. with the bonus of marrying the Cul de sac's hottie, Naz** sigh...  
  
Zim: **Is obviously thinking hard while leaning on his clenched fist with a determined look on his face, suddenly his eyes light up and then turn sinister looking** I've got an idea.. And with the combination of my INCREDIBLE leader skills with that of Eddy's . combine my UNLIMITED wisdom with that of Ed with two D's.. my INFINATE strength with that of Ed's.. and combine my.. (Tries to think of something amazing about Gir to add with himself but fails. aint he a conceded little green guy? (lol that's why I luv him!)) . Stuff, with that of Gir. and I think we can succeed!!  
  
Eddy: What's your plan?  
  
Zim: **Leans into a huddle with the group and explains his "Flawless" plans..**  
  
  
  
ShiMMy: ... So he just told you it was a rash?  
  
Random Voice: Yup, that's all he told me. and to this day I-  
  
ShiMMy: Oh look my readers are done with this chapter! Are you in suspense my friends? I hope so, hehe. Hopefully the last chapter (7) will be most enjoyable for you all. All I have to say is don't expect some thing as amazing as Zim says. he tends to embellish .. But, I'm definitely going to make an ATTEMPT to make it as amazing as he says.  
  
Random Voice: I have a question.  
  
ShiMMy: And what's that?  
  
Random Voice: Just how many times are you going to mention Eminem in this fic, I mean how many has it been so far? 3 times? 5? What are you obsessed?  
  
ShiMMy: .. NO, for your information I just happen to think his music fits well in these situations. plus my internet radio plays a lot of him so that helps too..  
  
Random Voice: But still .. you seems awfully obsessed to mention him so much  
  
ShiMMy: . I HAVE A QUESTION ...  
  
Random Voice: What?  
  
ShiMMY: .... What's your real name anyways?  
  
Random Voice: Um.. Bill.  
  
ShiMMy: Bill, huh? Well I think your judgmental and need to lay off cuz I'm not obsessed.. At least not over Eminem.. so chill.  
  
Random Bill: What are you obsessed with then?  
  
ShiMMy: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS .. Stay tuned ppl, for THE FINAL CHAPTER OF ZIM & GIR'S JACKASS ANTICS, pt. 7! ^_^ 


	7. cuz then you'll get no cookies

IZ/Jackass Antics ...... THE FINAL AFFAIR pt.7  
  
Ludacris- "Roll Out" is playing loudly. [Fade to ShiMMy sitting at her desk alone..nahha O.o] ShiMMy:. The Final Affair? Wtf came up with that title? It sounds like a porno! [Evil smirk] it could be .... **Threatens to change story to porno (people screaming)** I was kidding! Lmao, I love getting people worked up =) . any ways, I've come up with a few ideas for this chapter.. But like the rest of them, I come up with most of the stuff off the top of my ridiculously attractive head.  
  
Random guy named Bill: **Runs up to ShiMMy and slams his fist on her right hand, which is laid on the desk**  
  
ShiMMy: .That didn't hurt.  
  
Random guy named Bill: How could that not hurt?? I put all my upper body weight in that!  
  
ShiMMy: I don't know if you noticed.. But my hand is completely black from frostbite. I can't feel a thing.  
  
Random guy named Bill: Really? So if I do this [stomps his foot on her hand]. It won't hurt?  
  
ShiMMy: Nope.  
  
Random guy named Bill: Kick ass! [Takes out baseball bat from behind his back and slams it on her hand] That didn't hurt??  
  
ShiMMy: No.  
  
Random guy named Bill: [Swings bat back then hits ShiMMy in the head with it, knocking her off her chair] did that hurt??  
  
ShiMMy: [From floor] YES.  
  
Random guy named Bill: oh.  
  
Scene: The crew is working hard to get "supplies" for their big amazing plan Zim came up with. Zim is lying on the floor on his stomach working hard on his Laptop (Yes. I give Zim a laptop in this fic) to look up places they can find what they need.  
  
Zim: Curse these pop-ups! CURSE THEM!!!!!  
  
**Some random gay porn site ads start to pop up**  
  
Zim: What is this? .. AHH! [Exes out ads frantically]  
  
Double-D: You know.. I could get this done much faster. I'm quite skilled when it comes to computers-  
  
Zim: No, no! Zim knows what he's doing.. It'll jus take a sec more.  
  
Double-D: [Sighs and looks over at Eddy who is kicked back on what looks like a bean bag chair with a paper and pencil, looking like he's really concentrating on something] Oh, Eddy! Are you drawing out the plans of our operation?  
  
Eddy: Plans of our what now? [Looks up at Double-D and turns the paper around enough to show it is a sketch of Eddy swimming in a sea of jawbreakers]  
  
Double-D: Never mind. [Looks over at Ed & Gir, whom have become fast friends and have started playing with a pile of newspapers]  
  
Gir: [Wearing a newspaper hat and dancing on a pile of snippets] I'm a sailor!  
  
Ed: [With little scraps of newspaper just glued to a couple places on his head] Yes I am!  
  
Double-D: Assistance!  
  
Zim: [Still buried in the screen of his comp] Yes, Ed with the two D's?  
  
Double-D: I was just conjecturing over our plans and.. We haven't established where its going to take place.. Or have you progressed that area already?  
  
Zim: **Eyes dart a few times across his keyboard and the room then stares blankly at Double-D**  
  
Double-D: I'll take that as a no..  
  
Zim: [Looks at Double-D triumphantly] Don't you worry you're twice D'ed head. I'll come up with something! ... Eventually. **Looks back down at computer**  
  
Double-D: [Stands up] All right that does it.  
  
**Everyone looks up from their "work" to stare at Double-D**  
  
Double-D: This is absurd! No offence but do you all really think this is going to work? This "plan" is nonsensical! Between either getting detained or getting minced into the ground-  
  
Gir: [Running up to Zim, interrupting Double-D's " This'll never work" speech] Look master I made a hat!  
  
Zim: [Looks aggravated at Gir's newspaper hat and sees an article for the American Cartoon Award Ceremony] Gir, we don't have time for this- wait, give me that! [Takes hat]  
  
Gir: Weeeee! Masters gunna wear the hat!  
  
Zim: No, Gir! [Reads over article] Aha! Aha! This is PERFECT!!  
  
Eddy: What? What is it?? A Victoria's Secret ad?? Lemme see!  
  
Zim: [Stands up] I HAVE FOUND THE PERFECT PLACE!  
  
**Hands ad to Eddy and Double-D, Ed and Gir look over his shoulder to read it**  
  
Eddy: [Reading aloud] Upcoming events: The 23rd Annual American Cartoon Award Ceremonial, On the night of September 2nd 2002, 7:30 pm through 11:00 pm. will be shown live on Fox25 with host Jimmy Neutron. This is a not miss! It will be broadcasted across the country.  
  
**Everyone looks up at Zim who is standing in front of them looking rather smug with his arms cross and a big grin is spread across his face**  
  
Double-D: Oh my..  
  
Eddy: And WE weren't even nominated for anything! What a croc!  
  
Ed: I wanna go to the Ball Eddy! So does the bunny! [Holds up Gir by his Bunny ears]  
  
Gir: I'm gunna be QUEEN OF THE BALL! **Gir and Ed start giggling like maniacs**  
  
**Eddy, Double-D, and Zim stare with cocked eyebrows at Gir & Ed for a moment**  
  
ShiMMy: [Sitting at desk with a big bandage wrapped around her head] Okay, this is going to be longer than I expected so. I'm going to need another chapter.  
  
Random guy named Bill: AHA! LIAR! YOU SAID THIS WAS GOING TO BE THE LAST CHAPTER!!! LIES. ALL LIES!!!!  
  
ShiMMy: Could you keep it down a bit.. That swing to the head nearly gave me a concussion and I have a splitting headache..  
  
Random guy named Bill: SO WHAT? AT LEAST I DON'T LIE!!!! RAAAAAH!!!!!  
  
ShiMMy: **Takes brass knuckles out form a drawer in her desk and starts shining them with a rag**  
  
Random guy named Bill: DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THE TORMENT YOU PUT YOUR READERS THROUGH??? THEY EXPECTED ONE MORE CHAPTER AND NOW THERES TWO!!!!  
  
ShiMMy: **Finishes shining brass knuckles making them give a quick gleam of light skim across the front of them and slides them over her left hand**  
  
Random guy named Bill: YOU ARE A TERRIBLE PERSON!!! YOU NEED TO DI-  
  
**ShiMMy quickly stands up and punches random guy right in the face making him fall backwards out of view and then sits back down again**  
  
ShiMMy: Sorry bout that, stay tuned for the continuation of IZ/Jackass Antics, the final affair! ~Again, Thank u to the ppl who review, much love to u all! ^_^~ 


	8. Okay I'm done

IZ/JACKASS ANTICS ... THE FINAL AFFAIR ... AGAIN.....PT.8!!!!!!!!  
  
Dr. Dre fet. Snoop Dogg-"The next episode" LADADADADA! ITS THA MUTHAFUCKIN D O DOUBE G! SNOOP DOGG! "HOPE YA READY FOR THA NEXT EPISODE HEY-EY-EY-EY! ... Smoke weed every day!"-Nate Dogg (It's in the song, I'm not a stoner lol) **Fade to ShiMMy, who is now hiding under her desk with her keyboard typing**  
  
ShiMMy: [Talking in a low slightly frightened voice] Heya readers... I apologize if it has taken me a while to update this silly fic o' mine.. Um. I don't know how to say this but. I've been in hiding for that time I was away. erm, you see. when I knocked out random guy . he sort of.. Didn't get up.. and now I'm sort of wanted for manslaughter.... IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I SWEAR TO GOD. **police sirens are heard in the background** Oh Christ! Just start the fic! 0.0'  
  
~* Last we left off, Zim had found the perfect place for their AMAZING stunt to take place, The American Cartoon Award Ceremony.. Thingy. We now see the crew preparing to leave Zim's dressing room. (Harvey Danger- Flagpole sitta is playing for scene) Zim is packing a black duffel bag with supplies; Double-D appears to be drawing out blueprints and Gir and Ed are the hardest workers of all.. They're.... [Show Gir and Ed dancing like monkeys].. yeah, anyways. Skip to scene where Double-D is pointing out "the counter attack" as he calls it, then the crew travels to a costume shop and other places I don't feel like explaining. But I will say a man ran up to them wearing a golden-brown trench coat and to our view we just see him open the trench coat and they give a look of terror and disgust then Ed hits him in the head with the packed duffel bag and then they run away*~  
  
Scene: a large ballroom sort of place with dozens of round tables scattered about the floor with many cartoon celebs dressed formally and sitting comfortably at each table. There is a large stage against the wall with all of the tables facing it. In the middle of the ceiling is a slowly spinning disco ball, which is reflecting little circles of blue light all around the room. The stage has small yellow lights trimmed across it's edge turning on every other light as it glows to make it seem as if the lights were moving along the edge of the stage. Suddenly, the theme to Spongebob Squarepants begins .  
  
Scary pirate guy's voice: Ohhhhhhh.. Who's going home with an Anvil tonight? (F.Y.I. I'm making the awards like the Mtv awards but instead of moon men, their anvils, one of the first animated violent weapon .things)  
  
Jimmy Nuetron: **Slides out from behind the left curtain on the stage dressed as Sponge bob** Only the BEST nominees!  
  
Scary pirate guy's voice: Who's gunna win out the show tonight?  
  
Jimmy: Only the BEST nominees! **Throws off the big yellow cardboard box he used as the Sponge bob costume and underneath he is wearing Kim Possible's black tanktop, cargo pants and a red wig identical to her hair. The beat to "Call me beep me" starts** I'm your super brilliant boy and I'm here to host the show, you can't stop me cuz I'm Jim-my Nue-tron  
  
**Camera shows KP sitting at one of the round tables with Ron and that nekked mole rat all dressed up and laughing at the stupid impersonation. Meanwhile.. our friends are hiding in a nearby air vent watching the whole thing**  
  
Zim: [Stares flatly at the crossed-dressed moron on stage] You've got to be kidding me.  
  
Eddy: When should we start?  
  
Double-D: Not just yet.. We've got to let the crowd get settled and contended, that way when we do our trick ..  
  
Zim: [Evilly] they will be none the wiser...  
  
Double-D: Correct. We shall wait until the opening act is over with then we'll get prepared.  
  
Eddy: [Grins] You can be so underhanded sometimes Double-D  
  
Double-D: [Hangs head in temporary shame] I know... I blame you Eddy  
  
Eddy: [Snickers] ..say, where's Ed and that little tin guy that follows you around Zim?  
  
Zim: [Still staring through the vent at the stage] I sent them to get the chickens..  
  
Eddy: ...come again?  
  
Zim: I sent them to go get chickens for the plan  
  
Double-D: What does chickens have to do with anything?  
  
Zim: Nothing. I just didn't know what else those two half-wits could do, so I figured that would get them out of the way for a while.  
  
Eddy & Double-D: Ohhhh...  
  
Zim: [Staring at Jimmy who is know dressed as Johnny Bravo doing "the monkey" dance] Is he gonna be done soon???  
  
**20 minutes later.. Jimmy is dressed like Homer Simpson and still dancing on stage. The crowd as well as our crew have grown disgustedly bored except of course, for the people JN is imitating.**  
  
Homer Simpson: [Sitting at table with the rest of his family all spiffed up like they are at church] Who's the fat slob he's imitating now?  
  
**Another 20 minutes later.. Eddy is lying flat on his back passed out, Zim is passed out against the side of the vent looking like he did in nightmare begins with a big drool strand lingering out the side of his gaping mouth and Doube-D is bearly awake leaning on his fist struggling to keep his eyes open as JN is finally finishing up his last imitation, a Powerpuff Girl (Bubbles)**  
  
Jimmy: [Out of breath] Hello and welcome to the 23rd Annual American Cartoon Award Ceremony.. I'm your host Jimmy Nuetron, boy genius!  
  
Dexter: [Sitting at table with Cozmo, who has an arm around DeeDee] Pfft, PLEASE I have had the position of boy genius for how long now? . Errg, that poser big haired...  
  
Wanda: [Is sitting at a table with the guys from South Park and flashes an angry glance at Cozmo and DeeDee] **To SP guys** Tuh, look at him.. Not even 3 days since we broke up and he's already messing around with HER again.  
  
Stan: ... Who the hell said you could sit here?  
  
Double-D: [Snapping back into conscious state] Eddy! Zim! Wake up it's time!  
  
Eddy: [Leaning up quickly and looking around] Where am I?  
  
**Meanwhile.. Somewhere near by, a pale finger tapped the clothed edge of a round table**  
  
Dib: [all spiffed up wearing a black tux and tie] I can't believe he isn't here yet! This is a big event! Zim is the main character of our show, it's going to look disrespectful if we win something and he isn't here to accept it!  
  
Gaz: [still wearing her same attire accept her skull necklace, though same shape, is blinged-out with little diamonds.. that's about as dressy as she'll get. She's also paying no attention to whats happening and is playing her GS2] Who cares.. he's an idiot.  
  
Dib: [looks over at Gaz nonchalantly] I guess that's why you made out with him. **Gaz's eyes bug out**  
  
Stage announcer: And now, from the Middle of nowhere and Cartoon Network's Courage the cowardly dog.. Eustace and Muriel [Applause]  
  
Muriel: [Walks up to podium behind Eustace] **Into microphone** Oh! Isn't this just lovely how we get to announce "most sensitive male" Eustace?  
  
Eustace: Yeah. yeah.. lets just get this over with [sneers] don't think you ain't gettin' outta makin' me dinner tonight  
  
Muriel: Lets look at the nominees!  
  
[On a big screen over the podium, the nominees are shown with an announcer off stage saying who's who]  
  
Announcer: Most sensitive male.. Professor Utonium, "The Power Puff girls". [screen shows the professor hugging the PPGs and telling them how truly special they are] Ned Flanders, "The Simpsons".. [show Ned praying with his 2 kids with the fros] Johnny Bravo, "Johny Bravo".[show a few takes of Johnny strutting up to girls and making obscene comments and gestures..(lol)] Darren, "As told by Ginger". [show Darren giving advice to Ginger and her 2 losers friends..]  
  
Muriel: And the winner is...  
  
Eustace: [opens envelope and shows to Muriel]  
  
Muriel:. Johnny Bravo! [claps]  
  
**Juvenile-"Mama got ass" starts playing as Johnny slides across stage in his signature pose knocking Eustace off stage.**  
  
Johnny: [does poses behind podium for a few seconds, then snatches his anvil and Muriel and tips her back and gives her a big fat French kiss, you can see his giant tongue go "sluurp!" Over her entire head then puts her back] HooHa!  
  
Muriel: [slightly stumbling] Oh, what a nice young man!.  
  
Johnny: Oh I really didn't expect winning tonight but I made a quick list just in case.. [takes a rolled up piece of paper out of his shirt and rolls it out to show it hangs over the edge of the stage] First I'd like to thank all the foxy chicks out there ..  
  
[suddenly, a figure walks out on stage and leans against the wall to the far right of Johnny and Muriel. No one seems to really notice him and continues to listen to Johnny's thank you's. 3 minutes passed until a few people started stirring in the audience and questioning the figure.. he continued to lean against the wall swaying a bit.. and checking his watch a few times here and there. He seemed quite short, was wearing black sunglasses, camouflaged pants.. a black jacket.. and a turban on his head.. he had a beard and dark skin..]  
  
"..Osama?"  
  
[whispers continued]  
  
[Johnny suddenly realizing what the crowd was talking about, looked over at the figured and did his high-pitched girl scream and ran off-stage with his anvil in one hand, Muriel in the other]  
  
[The figure walked up to the podium and started talking in some sort of strange language and the crowd just stared in shock]  
  
Figure: Abba Luf Too Blegh dee!! ..ARRA!! AMOOT!! TOOF!!! BLAH!!!  
  
[the crowd continued to stare until another figure walked towards the stage dressed in a business suit and glasses]  
  
2nd Figure: Don't panic my friends! I have learned quite a bit of Slavic and can translate and negotiate! [looks over at figure on stage and starts babbling gibberish to him and they proceed to babble back and forth for a few seconds until the figure on stage pulls out an oozy and shoots the other figure knocking him backward. **audience gasps** the figure onstage starts babbling angrier and louder now pumping his fists in the air]  
  
[Everyone is now officially freaked out except for Gaz who just looks up for a second and then continues to her game with a mere "pfft.. who cares" another figure in crowd starts wailing "Oh what are we to do?? Our translator didn't even get a chance to translate what's going on here!! What are we to do??" Another person questions.. (Stan, SP) "if that's really Osama.. and he's here to hurt us.. why did he come alone?" The voice form the first ranting speaks up again.. "Uhhh, his henchmen are on holiday.." "How do you know?" "I JUST DO! BE SCARED. and by the way.. I can also tell he wants us to give him all our money.. and jawbreakers if you can.." People begin getting up and piling money and a few jawbreakers up in front of the podium on stage, "Osama" grins. All of a sudden, the door is kicked open by three new figures.. a tall red-head, a short blonde, and a middle- sized blue haired girl]  
  
Red-head: What? A party, and WE weren't invited!  
  
Voice from before (Eddy): Kankers! [ducks behind Marge Simpson's hair]  
  
Marie:[sneers] This place looks boring lets go [hearing that Eddy began praising silently behind the tall blue hair, but then hearing an objection..]  
  
Lee: [just stopping her two sisters from walking out with her arm] Not just yet... **sniffs** I smell Eds....  
  
[All three start giggling manically. Eddy's eyes bug out and sweat begins to pour off his forehead. And Double-D (the translator) whom is still lying on the ground "dead" starts sweating as well]  
  
Lee: **sniff** **sniff** [walks over to Marge with her sisters following] Mmmhmmm! [spreads Marges hair apart revealing Eddy curled up like a cat making whining dog noises] It's Eddy! [grabs Eddy's cheek] how's my little tatter tot?  
  
Marie: [looks over to see Double-D lying on ground, now completely red from burning sweat and fear] Double-D! [Jumps on D-D's stomach] My boyfriend! [Starts tickling him]  
  
Double-D: OOF!-AhAHAHAHA!!  
  
Crowd: [gasps!] He's alive!  
  
(Osama): [is now staring confused at the random girls who are mutilating his "carefully" constructed plans.] ARRUMINA HOO!!  
  
Lee: [looking at "Osama"] who's that bozo?  
  
Jimmy Nuetron: [suddenly walking back onstage] Yeah, who are you?? Is this some kind of joke or something??  
  
"Osama": B00?  
  
Gaz: [standing up] Since you asked.. [walks up to stage towards "Osama", He points his oozy threateningly at her, she takes it by the barrel and throws it over her shoulder and a shot goes off hitting a Butt Uglie and making a red splat on his forehead]  
  
BUM: OW!  
  
Cartman: Its just a paintball ya friggen wuss  
  
BUM: DOESNT MEAN IT DOESN'T HURT!! WAHA!!  
  
Cartman: Shut the fuck up. [Smacks him over the head with stick]  
  
Gaz:[stares with a cocked eyebrow for second at the BUM, then turns back to "Osama" and pulls his turban which is attached to his beard and two antennas pop up from under his turban which has smeared what appears to be face makeup to show he has green skin]  
  
Crowd: [GASP OF ALL GASPS!]  
  
Gaz: Zim. Figures. [Walks away]  
  
Dib: [in background] I KNEW IT!  
  
Gaz: No you didn't.  
  
Zim: Eh heh, heh. SURPRISE!  
  
Crowd: [scowls at Zim]  
  
Double-D: [pulls hat over face] Oh dear..  
  
Zim: Well. there's a perfectly good explanation for this.  
  
**Suddenly the double doors are kicked open and a tall, figure wearing a leopard bikini bottom, a short figure wearing bunny ears and a Hawaiian lei are standing there looking heroically holding arms full of chickens**  
  
Ed: WE GOT THE CHICKENS!!!!!!!!  
  
Gir: YAYYYYYY!!!!!  
  
Zim: ..which I'm not going to tell.. [jumps off stage towards Ed & Gir who are now letting all the chickens loose in the room. Eddy and Double-D manage to pimp-slap and escape the Kanker's and are now running to the door now too]  
  
Eddy: where'd you get the chickens Ed??  
  
Ed: Me and the bunny found a place with these guys wearing white lab coats and they said if I gave them my Oompa Loompa costume they'd give us chickens!  
  
Eddy, Double-D, & Zim: ...  
  
**Then they notice that the chickens are attacking everyone with pecks of doom.doom!**  
  
Crowd: Ahhhh! The madness!!  
  
Jimmy Nuetron: [fighting away a chicken] GET AWAY FROM ME YOU STUPID COW!  
  
Dexter: [from crowd] AND YOU CALL YOUSELF BOY GENIUS!?  
  
[The crew then turns around to run out the door but then realize there's about an entire squad worth of police officers waiting for them]  
  
Cop: [over megaphone] WE'VE GOT THE PLACE SURROUNDED! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!!  
  
Kenny: **gets killed by chicken**  
  
Stan: Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here  
  
Ed, Edd, Eddy, Zim, and Gir: [puts their hands over their heads and five cops come over and cuff them and read them their rights]  
  
Jimmy Nuetron: okay.. well, I guess.. the show must go on! [under breathe] I guess.. [walks off stage]  
  
Stage Announcer: And now, from the Hit Nick series Rugrats, Angelica Pickles!  
  
**Angelica walks out on stage wearing the exact skanky outfit as Christina Faguilera on the VMA's Kelis-"My neck, my back" plays for a minute as she walks to the podium**  
  
Angelica: In the year 2002, a lot of new cartoons have emerged..  
  
**Meanwhile, the doors of the award room are still open to show the police officers piling the Ed's into the paddy wagon when they come across Gir, he starts making a scene about biscuits again. Zim is standing behind the whole thing with an officer holding his arm. The nominees for the award Angelica is announcing are said, but the crew really didn't listen**  
  
Zim: [looks over his shoulder to see Angelica take out an envelope and open it]  
  
Angelica: [looks at open envelope and her face sort of sinks into frustration/surprise] **faking excitement** hmm. interesting.. Invader Zim  
  
Zim: [eyes widen and look at the officer holding his arm also looking astounded and lets go of his arm. Zim does a sort of jump rope move to bring his cuffed hands to the front of him and runs up to the stage] HAH! **snatches Anvil and holds it over his head**  
  
[Ed, Edd, Eddy, and Gir are standing in the entrance of the door whistling and shouting in gratification to Zim]  
  
Zim:[smugly] What's this one for?  
  
Angelica: [scowling] Best new cartoon.  
  
Zim: [into mic] THAT'S RIGHT!! BEST!! THAT'S ME!!!! .But I have to say.. this award should be going to my buddies the Ed's!!  
  
Ed's: [look complimented and like they are about to come up and take the award]  
  
Zim: But I'll keep it any ways.. [looks at Gir] LOOK GIR!! A NEW CHEW TOY! BAHA!  
  
Gir: [from background] YAAAAYYY!!!!  
  
Cop:[walking up to Zim] Alright that's enough.. time to go..  
  
**The cop takes Zim away who is still holding the award over his head and ranting about how much he kicks ass then the whole bunch is taken away in the paddy wagon**  
  
ShiMMy: [Is playing with her toes and mumbling about strawberries] .. Oh hello! Well that was the end!!! WHOOOOOOO!!! So whadja think????? TELL ME!! NOW REVIEW!!! REVIEW YOU FUCKER!!!!!!!  
  
**Suddenly Random guy named Bill wobbles into the room with his arms stretched outward and his skin is a greenish white color which is decaying off his face**  
  
ShiMMy: AHHHH!! RANDOM ZOMBIE!!!!  
  
Random zombie named Bill: [arms fall to sides] You killed me you bitch.  
  
ShiMMy: Yeah, about that. sorry.  
  
Random zombie named Bill: ahh. It's okay. The whole dead thing has really mellowed me out.  
  
ShiMMy: right. well, I hope you all enjoyed my fic! I didn't mean the whole.. fucker thing.. Don't kill me.  
  
Random zombie named Bill: .can't promise you that..  
  
ShiMMy: What?  
  
Random zombie named Bill: nothing.  
  
ShiMMy: anyway. I just wanted to add that I've been motivated to do two more fics, but I don't know which to do first. People, when you review, give me your opinion! #1 a girl suddenly shows up in Zim & Dib's playground and is offering kids wishes.. but she has a price. What will it be? How much more obvious will it sound? Will there be romance? Probably not.. #2 a spoof of that cheesy movie "A walk to remember" starring Mandy Whore- er, Moore. A new girl suddenly steps into Zim's life and his personality is dramatically changes. Will he ever be the same again? Will this be funny? HOPEFULLY. ~*Review and tell me what you think!-again, thank you to my positive reviews! HUGS AND KISSES FOR YOU! MUAH!*~ 


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